In the last class of this year’s Yoga & Meditation Vacation in Paros, I spoke to the students about the concept of “wellness” and how the word is a source of irritation for me. The irritation has little to do with the actual word, but rather because there doesn’t seem to be another word that’s as commonly referred to when speaking about taking care of oneself, and before you launch the term “self-care” at me, I also don’t love that term.
The ways we are set up to 1) not fuck up in life (and this is something we are trained to do from infancy when were taught by parental figures how to be in the family system, and, subsequently, in the world), 2) obediently participate in commonly accepted avenues and protocols of adherence to and participation of an economic system that is not, has never been and never will be designed for us to be healthy and well in, and 3) mindlessly accept that the combination of #1 and #2 listed above result in millions, if not billions, of people trying to financially and personally prevent themselves from “failing” in fear of not being “good enough” as just part of the game of life are, quite frankly, harmful.
The term “wellness” (much like “self-care) is so easily dismissed and relegated to the realm of the granola, the tree-hugging. And yet the word “wellness” is only applied in modern times to illustrate how the commonly accepted ways and protocols of being in an industrialized society are harmful, how they make us sick, how they are rooted in, and contribute to, dis-ease. Playing the game of life solely to compete and emerge victorious is going to kill us. In fact, it’s already doing just that. The stress and fatigue that are the bedfellows of worshipping the false idols of money and power are killers. Sometimes taking us out like sharp shooters, other times slowly poisoning us until the disease has silently, insidiously, taken over, not fucking up while trying not to lose the material things we have gained in times of abundance is what will kill most of us.
Instead of “wellness”, how about we use words and terms like “rebellion”, “rejection”, “disruption”, or even “agility and resilience”? I’m in the agility and resilience industry. The industry of rebellion, rejecting most of what has tried to convince me to stay stupid and unquestioning so that certain powers that be, powers entrenched in financial gain, can make money off of my existence. I’m in the industry of disrupting archaic systems that were put into place centuries ago by those who could gain power by subjugating anyone who didn’t look or sound like them. I’m an Agility and Resilience Coach.
I know, I know, we’ll keep using terms like “wellness” and “self-care”. But please, let’s not forget that the only reasons we use those is because they arise with their opposites, “illness” and “self-neglect”..These are terms that define the very core of our societies and which we allow to define our lives when we reject taking care of ourselves, mind, body and spirit, in place of running ourselves ragged until disease reigns and vitality dwindles.
Take care of your mind. Take care of your thoughts and police them, understanding just because you think something does not make it true nor does it make it helpful. Take care of your emotions and welcome them all instead of trying to suppress or ignore them. Take care of your physical body so that if it gets hurt, you can bounce back quicker. In fact, take care of all of it so that when there is hurt, you can bounce back quicker. Rebel against being dumbed down. Reject the ways that everyone else seems to accept misery and needless suffering and choose new ways, new paradigms, new perspectives. Disrupt whatever systems you feel are yours to disrupt, however you feel is an honest and authentic expression of what you believe to be true. Stay agile and resilient so that you can roll with the changes that are inevitable. Take care. To do so is harder than to allow misery, needless suffering and illness to integrate. But just take care because, as my late grandmother Lillian Berlin taught me, “no one is going to do it for you”.
Take care.
